The Things that Cannot be Undone
by YukisTwin1212
Summary: On a stormy night, Dean and Castiel become drunk and end up spending the night in bed. At first the event is ignored and something that was a mistake; but when something life changing happens, Dean and Castiel must put aside their differences and work together. Features: Rape, Mpreg, Angst, and loads of Drama.
1. Drunk

_Before you read this story, please understand this. The characters and their personalities are as realistic as possible, although I am not completely going with the story line. This is a rape story. Its powerful, Castiel is hurt emotionally and physically. Dean also suffers. I know it's gonna start off really rough but trust me, the story will get better._

Lighting struck across the sky in El Paso, Texas, followed by a loud boom of thunder. Despite the storm, it was quiet at the Montana Motel; only having one room occupied for the night. Inside the room were the Winchester brothers, Dean and Sam, and the angel of Thursday, Castiel. Having recently returned from a hunt against a vampire nest that was harassing a family, they were exhausted from their "adventure".

"Man, that nest was a pain in the ass." Dean groaned as he prepared some ice for his dislocated shoulder.

"Hold your shoulder still." Sam sighed. "On the count of three; one, two"-

*Pop!

Dean yelled at the immediate pain but quickly calmed himself down by placing the ice on the swollen joint.

Castiel sat on one of the two queen sized beds, watching the television that sat on a small shelf. Today felt completely off. First the three were constantly being attacked by various groups of monsters like vampires and demons; then the angel radio had been silent for about a week now. He decided to hang around the Winchester brothers for fear that a new apocalypse may be taking place and that they would be in danger once more. He was also afraid that he was being hunted since he hadn't been able to contact his brothers and sisters up in Heaven or here on Earth.

"You know, it's storming pretty badly out there. I think I might go check on that family and make sure they are taken care of."

"Seriously Sam, they're fine; I think they can handle a terrible storm like this. Doesn't it always storm out here in El Paso?"

"Still, I was expecting a call after they dealt with the police but they haven't contacted me."

"Yeah well maybe their power went out."

"I'm gonna go check, they don't live very far anyway. I'll call you if there's any problem."

Sam grabbed his jacket and rushed out the door.

"Wait, Sammy! Damn it!" Dean muttered a few choice words, and then walked over to the kitchen to pull out a bottle of whiskey. He then pulled an empty glass from one of the cupboards.

"May I join you?" the angel appeared behind him.

"Sure," Dean pulled out another glass and set them on the table along with the whiskey. The two sat across from each other, and Dean poured the whiskey into both glass without saying a word.

Castiel immedietely chugged his portion and nudged Dean for another glass.

"Is everything alright, Cas?" Dean poured another glass for the angel; then he drank some from his own glass.

"Things have been quiet lately; that is why I chose to stand by you and Sam. Something could be going on that we don't know about yet."

"So you were following us for a week because you were worried about us? Aw, that's so sweet of you." Dean grinned.

Castiel downed his second glass and sat back. When he looked at Dean, his vision had suddenly been affected greatly. This was not right; he had his grace back, how would two glasses of whiskey affect him?

Dean finished his glass and suddenly grabbed his head.

"Ugh, I guess I can't handle my alcohol like I used to."

"Are you finding your vision, blurry?"

"Yeah," Dean looked at the angel. "Wait, are you feeling dizzy too?"

Castiel nodded.

"What the hell," Dean grabbed the bottle and sniffed inside. "Did someone put some drugs in this? Room service wasn't supposed to come in, we had our 'do not disturb' sign." He sat down the bottle and slapped his hands over his eyes, leaning on the table. He remained like this for several minutes.

Castiel decided Dean needed help getting to bed. He slowly got up, trying not to startle the hunter, and then made his way over to the other side of the table.

"Dean, let me help you get to your bed so you can rest."

Dean did not respond.

"Dean," Castiel lay his hand on his shoulder to shake him. Without any warning, Dean stood up and grabbed the angel's arm, then slammed him against the wall.

"Dean, are you okay?"

The hunter maintained his grip on his arms, and used the other hand to grab Castiel's face and leaned in. The angel stared into his bright green eyes, not sure of the hunter's intentions. He didn't move however when Dean suddenly pressed his lips against his own. Castiel didn't move, frozen by this surprising action. He could feel Dean's tongue playing in his mouth; he had never experienced a kiss quite like this before. When the kiss was broken, Dean moved his lips down his neck and began unbuttoning his t-shirt.

"Dean, what are you doing?" Castiel tried to push the hunter gently, but he wouldn't budge. He pushed even harder but still, Dean was stronger.

"Dean, stop it!" Castiel managed to push the hunter off. He immediately regretted his action when he saw a look of anger on Dean's face, and he grabbed his tie, throwing him onto the bed.

Castiel was scared; Dean was much too powerful, but he couldn't sense anything possessing him. Was his grace getting weak?

Dean straddled himself over the angel's hip and took off his shirt. He then ripped Castiel's tie off as well as the shirt, not caring that the buttons broke.

"Dean, you're under a spell of some sort; snap out of it!" Castiel tried to fight him off.

Dean pinned down his arms and went in for another kiss; it was sloppier than the first one. When their lips parted, Dean trailed to his left nipple and bit it hard.

"Hnnngh," Castiel bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut. "Dean, please…stop."

The hunter didn't listen; he continued to violate his nipple by licking and at the same time trailed his free hand into the angel's pants.

Castiel jumped; this was definitely something he had never experienced before. Dean finished playing with his nipple and was now focused on his penis which was forming a bulge in his pants. He then ripped off the pants to reveal the erection, and began stroking it. When Castiel tried to stop him, Dean simply used his other hand to pin his arms down once again. He breathed heavily; it felt so good but he knew it was wrong. Men don't normally do these kinds of things do they? He knew Dean was under some sort of spell and he had to find a way to stop it. But he was too strong, and it felt so good, he didn't want him to stop.

"Dean…" it was the only thing he could manage to say as he felt himself getting closer and closer…

"Dean, I'm gonna!"-

*Squirt

He came all over himself and Dean; it was an absolute mess on the sheets. Castiel lay on the bed, exhausted from what just happened; but Dean wasn't done. He pulled down his own pants and spread apart the angel's legs.

At first Castiel was confused; he didn't know what he had planned on doing next. He figured it out too late however when Dean was hovered over him, and he felt his penis shove into him. Castiel screamed out in pain, trying to push him away.

"Dean, it hurts, please stop; this is wrong!"

He began to thrust fast, not giving the angel a chance to loosen up. This whole thing hurt like hell; he didn't want this, any of this. When he couldn't push him off, he wrapped his arms around Dean's neck to cope with the pain and prayed that this night would be over quickly. He could feel a few tears streaming down his cheeks. All he could hear was Dean's soft grunt and his screaming voice each time Dean pushed in. When his prostate was hit, he screamed even louder; Dean pulled his hair to hold his head back to allow Castiel to scream more. It was like he enjoyed hearing Castiel in pain, something the 'real' Dean would never do. They were close friends, they cared about each other. But this, this was not something that he would do to him. Despite how real it felt, Castiel knew it had to be a dream; a really horrible dream.

As the thrusting got faster and faster, Castiel could see the room begin to fade. He wasn't sure how much longer he could stay awake.

Dean suddenly started making loud grunts and his hands tensed around the angel's arms. Castiel knew Dean was about to come inside of him, but he was too exhausted to even do anything about it. He finally gave up staying awake, and blacked out.


	2. About Last Night

Sam rolled over in his bed and groaned. What time was it? It was still dark outside; and he was wide awake. He remembered getting home pretty late and found the room completely dark, so he quickly changed and hopped into bed, not even bothering to check on Dean. Castiel probably went off, again. Sam squinted at the clock to see that it was six 'o clock; he sighed, figuring going back to sleep wouldn't do anything. He quietly got out of bed and walked over to the kitchen, flicking on the light, and then helped himself to a glass of water. As he took a sip, he noticed the table had the whiskey out and two empty glasses set up. He shook his head. Dean's drinking habit was starting to increase more; it was his way of coping with the crap they dealt with on a daily basis. Sam placed the glasses into the sink and stared towards Dean's bed. He felt bad; his brother has gone through so much to keep him alive. No wonder he was exhausted all the time.

Sam squinted towards the bed; something wasn't right about the shape of it. Dean was half under the covers and half out, but he wasn't sprawled out like he always was. Instead he was sleeping on one side. That was when he noticed a lump on the other side of the bed. Was someone under the covers with him? Did he bring some chick home while he was gone? There's no way, it was storming bad and his shoulder was just popped back into place! Sam quickly grabbed a gun from the counter and crept over to the bed.

When he got close, Dean suddenly shifted and rolled over. Sam paused for a moment.

"Dean?"

Dean lifted his head towards the sound of his brother's voice.

"It's still dark out, why in the hell are you up man?" Dean noticed that Sam was holding a gun towards the bed. "Why are you aiming a gun at me?"

"Not you," Sam gestured the gun towards the lump. Dean held his breath for a moment, noticing the lump was breathing. He shrugged and carefully lifted the sheet.

"Cas,"! Dean jumped and fell out of bed.

"Dude, you're naked!" Sam spun around and covered his eyes.

"Where the hell are my clothes?!" Dean used one hand to hold the blanket over him and the other to grab his pants off the floor.

Castiel sat up slowly, covering himself with another blanket.

"What the hell happened last night?" Sam turned back around once Dean had his pants on.

"You didn't see this when you got back?"

"No, it was dark. And I figured Cas had gone off somewhere. Why the hell are you two sharing a bed?"

"I don't know, I don't even remember getting into bed." Dean mumbled.

"Wait, so you don't even remember getting into bed?" Sam sighed. "Cas, do you remember?"

Castiel remained silent.

"Cas?"

"I need to use the restroom."

"Um, okay."

Castiel crept out of the bed, still covering his body; then shuffled into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

"Something obviously happened last night; Cas just gave us the cold shoulder! Dean, you need to think and tell me what you remember."

Dean put on his shirt and sat on the bed. He bent over to pick up Castiel's shirt, and noticed the broken buttons.

"Honestly Sam, the last thing I remember was pouring a few drinks for the both of us. I don't remember how I got into the bed." He sighed and threw Cas's shirt on the floor.

"Well, judging by the scene Dean; it looks obvious what happened."

"No it doesn't." Dean quickly stood up and walked into the kitchen.

"Dean, are you worried that maybe you and"-

"Shut up!" Dean raised his voice. "I don't want to talk about it anymore, okay?"

Sam sighed. "Fine, but eventually you're gonna have to. Because if what I think happened did happen, then it explains why Cas didn't say too much and went into the bathroom."  
"And if we do talk about it, what is there to talk about?"

Sam shrugged. "I don't know Dean, but I don't think this is something that should be ignored."

"Well for now, let's just get on the road and head back to the bunker, okay? Cas didn't seem to want to say anything so let's respect that."

"Okay." Sam nodded. He headed to his bed and began packing.

Castiel stared into the mirror of the bathroom.

"It was just a horrible dream." He mumbled. He leaned into the mirror and inspected his skin. His eyes widened at the sight of a few light purple spots on the lower part of his neck. Where did those come from?

His back ached badly when he tried standing up straight; he decided to hop in the shower to clean himself since he was too weak to use his powers. He hunched over in the tub and switched it for the water to go to the shower nozzle; then dropped the blanket and hopped into the steaming hot water. He carefully massaged his back and legs, hoping to rid himself of some of the pain he had. He suddenly froze however, when he felt something dripping down his legs. He looked down and inspected the thick liquid; and then he remembered.

Castiel tumbled to the floor of the tub and covered his eyes, sobbing to himself quietly. All the details from last night were overflowing his mind; Dean taking advantage of him and doing such a horrible act. But he knew it couldn't have been Dean; something happened last night and he needed to figure out why. But for now he would need a few days to recover and clear his head.

He quickly finished washing and hopped out of the tub; then grabbed the nearest towel and wrapped it around his waist. He groaned; his clothes were in the other room. Opening the door halfway, he peeked out and called out to Sam.

"Sam?"

"What's up, Cas?" Sam stopped his packing and walked over to the door.

"Could you bring me my clothes?"

"Uh, sure thing", Sam headed to Dean's bed and grabbed every piece of clothing he could find; then headed back to the door.

"Here you go."

"Thanks." Castiel quickly grabbed his clothes and shut the door behind him.

A few minutes later, he exited the bathroom and sat on Sam's bed.

"I'm gonna bring some bags to the car." Dean yelled from the kitchen and then walked out.

"Cas, what happened last night?" Sam softly spoke.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am sure. There is nothing to talk about." Castiel sighed and helped Sam finish packing.

"Alright, everything is packed in the trunk; let's hit the road and head home." Dean slammed the trunk closed and got into the driver's seat, followed by Sam who sat in the passenger seat and Castiel who sat behind the driver's seat.

"I can hear my bed at the bunker calling to me." Dean grinned and blasted on some classic ACDC. They sped off down the road, heading back to the place that they called home.


	3. Ailment

For two whole months, there was this awkwardness between the three. After the event had taken place; neither Dean nor Castiel wanted to talk about it no matter how many times Sam tried to bring it up. The air had been stiff; Castiel and Dean refused to look each other in the eye. It was heartbreaking for Sam to watch. The two had been best friends; who knew their friendship could be torn so easily?

Sam yawned as he poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table while Dean cooked both of them some breakfast. Despite that he refused to speak to the angel, he still made some extra food for him.

"Hey Dean,"

"Yeah,"

"I found an article; female infants are being taken from their home. Think it's a case?"

"Maybe, I mean we haven't heard from any angel or demon in two months. It's almost like they don't want anything to do with us anymore. Not even Crowley."

"Yeah, well there hasn't been any cases that would point to another apocolypse, or we're just not searching hard enough." Sam took a sip from his coffee.

Castiel entered the kitchen and took a sit next to Sam.

"Morning Cas, did you sleep well last night?"

"Yes. Strangely, I've been very tired lately. It's almost as if my grace is gone."

"And you still haven't heard from the angels, right?"

Castiel shook his head. He grabbed a piece of toast from the center of the table and took a bite.

"We found a possible case, do you want to check it out with us or do you plan on staying here?" Sam looked at the angel. Castiel didn't respond. He was staring straight ahead, then at the toast.

"Cas, is something wrong?"

Castiel suddenly stood up and ran to the nearest trash can, puking up his breakfast that he had just starting enjoying.  
"Cas"! Sam rushed over to help the poor angel to his feet. Dean set the pan filled with scrambled eggs off the stove and then rushed over.

"Is he okay?"

Castiel continued to dry heave, pressing his hand against the wall to keep steady. Once he finished he stood straight and cleared his throat.

"That didn't feel good."  
"Well you don't look good, you look really pale. Let's get you back to your room." Sam gripped his arm around Castiel's and the two slowly headed back to his bedroom. Dean rushed back to the eggs and scraped them onto a plate, then headed into Castiel's room.

"Just stay here. I'm gonna check your temperature." Sam left the room, walking past Dean to search for the thermometer. Dean crept into the room, looking at the angel for the first time since their silence.

"Are you okay?"

Castiel looked at Dean, hardly reacting to the fact that he was suddenly talking to him.

"Yeah, I think so." He adjusted himself on his bed.

Sam rushed back into the room with a thermometer.

"Hold this under your tongue."

Castiel did as he was told and waited until it beeped, then Sam pulled it out and looked.

"99.9, you don't have a temperature."

"Maybe it was just bad bread?" Dean asked.

"I don't know, I had some too but I feel fine."

Sam sighed. "Well how about this, if it was just a bad toast we don't have to worry; but if you're experiencing any other symptoms, you let us know. If anything you might have picked up a bad virus of some sort."

"Should we be near him then?" Dean raised an eyebrow.

"Well maybe it only affects angels. Let us know if you get sick again, okay?"

Castiel nodded.

"Come on Dean." Sam nudged his brother and left the room. Dean watched the angel lay down, back facing toward him before he followed his brother.

"You know, that was the first time you've spoken to Cas in a while."

"He got sick; I'm not supposed to worry?"

"That's not what I meant. You two had been avoiding each other for two months!"

Dean sighed and sat at the table. "I don't know man."

"Maybe if you two could at least talk about what happened, you can mend your friendship and we can be back to normal."

"How are we supposed to go back to normal? What happened already happened and it changed a lot of things."

"You can at least try to move forward, which you and Cas are definitely not doing."

The two heard Castiel vomiting again and rushed back to help.

This time he was in the bathroom, hunched over the toilet.

Sam looked at Dean. "We need to get him to a doctor."

"How is a regular doctor going to figure out what's wrong with an angel?"  
Sam thought for a moment. Dean was right, if Cas wasn't sick with a normal human illness, how will they figure out what's wrong with him?

"I know a friend who worked as a nurse. She's retired but I'm sure she can help us."

"Where does she live?"

"Just a few states over,"

Dean groaned. "We're not driving far just for some nurse."

"Would you rather Cas get worse? We don't even know if he's going to get better. We should act fast if we want to figure out what's wrong."

Dean looked at the angel who has just started brushing his teeth and turned to the Winchester brothers.

"What's wrong?" he muffled.

Dean sighed. "We're going to the doctor.


	4. News

*Knock, knock

"Go away; I don't care what you're selling!" A gruff voice was heard on the other side of the door.

"Patrice? It's Sam Winchester."

There was silence, then the door swinging open. A short woman in her late 50s appeared wearing an apron and smelled of fresh food that had just been cut.

"Sam Winchester, what brings you here? And who are these two fellows behind?"

"This is my brother Dean and our friend Castiel."

"Well hello friends; come in, I just started dinner."

"Thanks." Sam smiled. The three followed Patrice in and took a seat in her kitchen.

"Give me a few seconds to stir and then I'll be right there." Patrice called out as she quickly rushed to the pot that was bubbling.

"How are you holding up Cas?" Dean grabbed a small bin from the corner of the room and gave it to the angel.

"The food is overwhelming."

"Try not to focus on the smell so much." Sam stood as Patrice reentered the room.  
"Is he okay?"

"That's why we came to you for help. I know you've helped non humans before. Cas is an angel and we don't know what he's sick with."  
"An angel huh? Aren't you supposed to play the harp and have heavenly lights shine on you from above?" She took a seat next to Cas and felt his forehead.

"No temperature. Nausea, correct? Does the smell of my cooking overwhelm you as well?"

Castiel quickly nodded.

"Any other symptoms that you can think of?"

Castiel looked at and Dean and Sam. "Um…"

Patrice looked at the hunters.

"Could you boys give us some privacy for a few moments?"

The Winchester brothers made their way into the kitchen.

"Never thought Cas would be embarrassed about his symptoms." Dean smirked as he took a whiff of the dinner.

"It's no laughing matter Dean. Hopefully she can figure out what's wrong."

"So how did you know she's helped monster before?"

"I read about her from Bobby's old journals. They worked together and helped one monster who was sick. Didn't say what kind it was but I assume if they helped it, it was friendly. I came one time to help her with a mission; this was when you were in Purgatory."

"Ah." Dean leaned against the wall.

"Do you find yourself urinating frequently now?"

"Yeah, it started a couple days ago. I just thought from the missions we were doing that I didn't get the chance to use a restroom often."

"This question is going to be a little more personal but you don't have to answer completely."

"Okay." Castiel nodded.

"Do you have a sexual history? When was the last time you had intercourse?"

"Um…" Cas found himself blushing. He stumbled on his words before he finally got an answer out. "About two months ago."

"Sorry for prying, but it will help me figure out what's wrong. Since you're not human I have to consider all possibilities."

Castiel nodded.

"Come on, dinner is almost ready." She helped the angel up.

"Alright boys, there's still extra in the pot so have at it. I'm going to make a quick run to get some supplies and then we'll see if we can figure out what's wrong with poor Castiel." Patrice grabbed her purse and headed out the door.

"Wow, she's already on it."

"She works fast, that's for sure."

Castiel slowly ate his food, keeping the trash bin nearby.

"You don't need to eat it if you don't want you."

"I don't, but I'm very hungry after throwing up all day."

"Here, let me get you some water so you stay hydrated." Sam stood up and opened a cabinet to grab a glass.

"So what kind of questions did she ask?" Dean glanced at the angel.

Castiel kept quiet. Dean shrugged and went back to eating.

"Here you go Cas."

"Thank you Sam."

Before Sam took his seat, he smacked Dean across the shoulder.

"Ow!"

After dinner, the boys cleaned up before Patrice got home. Castiel was holding as best as he could to not vomit.

"At least it's not consistent anymore." Sam watched Castiel take a seat back on the couch.

"I'm home everyone." Patrice carried a bag full of small boxes from the pharmacy. She took it to the bathroom, and then came out with a cup.

"Castiel dear, I will need you to pee in this cup."

Castiel carefully stood up, then made his way into the restroom, taking the cup with him.

"What did you get exactly?" Dean asked.

"Just something to start out with. Hopefully this is the problem and that he's not too sick."

Dean didn't understand why Patrice wasn't being specific about what she got from the store; what could she have possibly bought?

Castiel exited the restroom, leaving the cup behind. Patrice then headed into the restroom.

"This will only take a few minutes."

Sam watched Castiel who was surprisingly calm. Dean on the other hand, couldn't sit still and kept staring at the clock. It was strange that he was so worried for the angel. Or maybe he was just impatient.

Suddenly the door opened.

"Sam, can you come in here for a moment?"

"Sure." He quickly stood up and rushed over into the restroom.

"What's wrong?"

Patrice kept her voice low. "Well, the good news is that he isn't sick."  
"And what's the bad news?"  
"Well, it depends on how you all take it. For many people, it would be great news, but I'm sure this wasn't planned."

"What wasn't planned?"

Patrice sighed and handed Sam a long white stick.

"Castiel is pregnant."

"W-what?" Sam whispered.

"He did tell me that he had an encounter only a couple months ago."

 _Dean._ Sam looked at Patrice. "What do we do?"

"We tell him of course."

Sam sighed and nodded. "Okay."

Sam opened the door and walked over to Castiel.

"What is it?" The angel asked.

Sam handed him the white stick. "You're pregnant."

Dean quickly stood and backed up. "Excuse me?"

"I'm…pregnant? But, how? I'm a male."

"That's what I thought too, but do angels even reproduce?" Patrice asked.

"No, they shouldn't be able to. What does it mean?"  
"I don't know, but that's why you've been sick. I don't know exactly how far along you are but if I could guess, it would be about 7-8 weeks along."

Dean hadn't made a single sound or movement since standing up.

 _How could Cas be pregnant? There's just no way! Unless… no… then that would make me…_

"So what do we do?" Dean finally spoke.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"I mean, do we keep the thing or…"

Sam's face froze. "Oh."

Sam couldn't believe it. Sure, there was no way they could raise a child with the jobs they had; and given the fact that there was no way it should have been conceived in the first place. But the fact that Dean's response was completely selfish. _Should we keep it?_ He didn't even ask how Castiel felt about the whole ordeal.

"Well, Castiel isn't really that far along. That could give you some time to figure out some things." Patrice broke the silence.

"Like what?" Castiel asked.

"Well for starters, why were you able to get pregnant? Unless you somehow altered your vessels reproductive organs, this was no accident."

"She's right. We could go back to the bunker and hit the books. But Cas,"

"Yes?"

"It's your decision what we do in the end." Sam nodded.

"My decision?"

"It's your body dear, well sort of." Patrice sat next to the angel and held his hand. "If you do decide to keep it, I will provide a list of things that you will need to stay healthy."

Castiel nodded and looked down.

"We should get going now." Dean grabbed his bag and quickly exited the house.

"Dean!" Sam rushed out as well.

Castiel stood up to leave, but Patrice stopped him.

"Castiel, if you ever need any help, call me okay?"

"Thank you." Castiel smiled before following the Winchester brothers.


	5. Questions

Dean slammed his bag onto the table before going into his room and slamming the door behind him. Slowly following into the bunker was Sam and Castiel.

"So, I'm gonna go grab my laptop. Do you need anything right now Cas?"

Castiel shook his head.  
"Okay. Let me know, I'll be here."

"Okay." Castiel waited until Sam left the room, then made his way to his private bathroom and gently closed the door.

Castiel sat on the lid of the toilet and covered his face for a moment.

 _Pregnant._

Out of all the scenarios he thought of, this one took the cake. He sincerely wished he was actually sick with some form of deadly virus and that was it. Well, he was sick. There was a parasite growing inside of him. Unnatural, unnerving; there was no reason to keep it. That night was a mistake, and this was punishment. Why would God, his father, let such an abomination exist?

He stood up and unbuttoned his shirt. This thing had to die. Maybe if he pushed his stomach harsh enough, it would miscarry; and everyone could move on with their lives. He carefully pressed into his abdomen, looking for the fetus. He stopped however, when he felt something firm. His lips began to shake and the tears began to drop. He couldn't do it. Why couldn't he do it? It was just a baby.

 _Yes, a baby. His baby._

He changed his hand from pressing, to gently cradling his abdomen. There was no way he would let it die. But how could he raise it? He would take care of it alone of course; knowing Dean would want no part in raising a child. And he was fine with that. He was an angel; he could manage a baby on his own. And besides, he had plenty of time to plan out what to do in the meantime. He quickly re-buttoned his shirt and exited the restroom to find Sam.

Sam sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Is something wrong, Sam?" Castiel entered the room quietly.

"I don't know." Sam shook his head and continued to type on his laptop.

"Did you find anything?"

"No, that's the problem."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, there's nothing. There are a few stories here and there but it's all different. There's no true source of this kind of folklore."  
"Perhaps it was lost in translation long ago. There are a few stories that have never been solved and only a select few of angels and demons know them."

"Can't you ask the angels then?"

"The angels that most likely know them are the archangels."  
"Great." He closed his laptop. "Well the only thing I can think of is; this didn't happen by accident. If that's the case, someone could be after us."

"What should we do then?"

"You are going to spend the majority of your time here in the bunker. We can't risk you getting hurt."  
"What about you and Dean?"  
"We're gonna figure out who is behind this and hunt them down. You might be safe for now but as you um, start showing and progress further, it will become more dangerous."

"I understand."

"Alright, Patrice told me you have to take vitamins to stay healthy. So I will run to the store later to get some. She may even come here a few times to make sure everything looks good."

"Why?"

"Well it's because you're a male Cas, how are you going to deliver? And we're not even sure if the fetus will grow properly."

Castiel nodded. "Okay." He looked at Dean's bedroom door which had stayed closed this entire time. "What are we going to do about Dean right now?"

Sam sighed. "I think he needs some alone time. I'll talk to him later okay?"

"Why is he so concerned? He's not the one carrying the fetus."

"Yeah well, he did assist in… anyways, he has his own reasons to be upset; so don't push him right now okay?"

"Okay."

Dean lay on the center of his bed with headphones blasting music. He was surprised at himself for not breaking down and throwing things everywhere. He stared at the ceiling, trying to escape the reality that was going on.

 _This is all a dream, it has to be. There's just no way._

Dean had lied that he didn't remember anything that had happened that night nearly two months ago. But to be honest, the echoes of Castiel's scream have haunted him ever since that day. He remembered Castiel's pleas to stop and watching himself preventing the angel from fighting back. He remembered when Castiel fainted and he just kept going. How could he. How dare he. He _raped_ his best friend; the one who saved his ass so many times and vice versa. Not only that, but now Castiel has to deal with the burden. It should have been him. Cas shouldn't have to deal with this. Dean didn't know what to do. He didn't think he could ever look at Castiel again. He didn't _deserve_ to be in his presence again. He screwed it all up.

Sitting up, he stared at the clock. A whole hour had passed since he locked himself in his room. He took off his headphones; it was so quiet. What were Sam and Cas doing this whole time? Dean quietly opened up his bedroom door and walked to where Sam was standing; waiting for his brother.  
"Are you going somewhere?" Dean asked.

"Yes, you and I are gonna go to a bar." Sam tossed him his jacket.

"Why?"

"What, we can't hang out and have a couple beers?"

Dean looked around. "We can't do that here?"

"Just, come on. I'll drive if you want."

"Alright," Dean followed his brother out of the bunker.

Castiel came from around the corner when they had gone; looking at a bottle of pills that Sam had just bought him. He sighed and took one before heading to his room.


	6. Talk

"Thank you." Sam accepted the two beers from the bartender and took his seat where Dean waited.

"Thanks." Dean took a sip of his beer.

Sam stared at his brother, trying to figure out what to say and how to say it. His brother noticed this.

"Is there something on your mind? I mean besides the whole…"

"I actually wanted to ask how you were doing; you haven't said much since we left Patrice's house. How are you handling things?"

Dean sighed. "The problem is, I don't know how to handle things right now. What do I do? How should I react?"

"Well I could understand you having mixed emotions right now."

"I don't know man; how am I even supposed to talk to Cas right now? Do I give him space or do I get involved? I don't even know if Cas would even want my help considering it's my fault."

"Dean, it wasn't your fault; you were being controlled by someone."

"Still doesn't change the fact that Cas is pregnant." Dean swallowed at that last word.

"I can't imagine how hard it is for you two right now, but we need to focus on something more serious. This was done on purpose; meaning someone is after us."

Dean played with his beer bottle. "So what do we do?"

"We need to figure out who it is. The sooner we find them, the sooner we can understand the situation at hand."

"What's there to understand, Sam? The only complicated thing is that Cas is a man."

"Look, Dean…"

"Sam, if you need me to talk to Cas, I'll talk to Cas. Just not right now, okay? And we'll hunt this guy down as well."

"Alright, good." Sam took a sip of his beer.

"By the way, since it's your idea; why haven't you done any hunting yet?"  
"It wasn't an idea."

"Where do we start?"

"Well," Sam paused and looked past Dean, where a male figure wearing sunglasses and a hat was staring at the Winchester brothers; but had quickly looked away when Sam glanced at him.

"Hey, behind you."

"What," Dean started to look but Sam stopped him.

"We don't want to look obvious. But the person behind you keeps glancing at us. It's like he knows something."

"We'll grab him in the back."

"Let's do it."

*SLAM

"Who are you?" Dean maintained a strong grip on the stranger.

Sam looked around the alley to make sure they weren't seen. "Are you following us?"

The man chuckled. "I overheard you two talking; so I guess the rumors are true."

"Rumors?"

"You really think this kind of thing would go unnoticed by the demons? By the angels?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'd keep a close watch on your precious angel; his brothers and sisters aren't too happy about the news. I heard them talking about extermination."

Dean held his hands around the demon's neck tightly. "And what about the demons,"

"We demons believe it's part of a prophecy."

"What kind of prophecy?" Sam asked.

"A child born in an unnatural way will raise hell on Earth, and unleash the ultimate monster."

"What, Lucifer? He's locked away."

"Not Lucifer." The demon laughed.

"Anything else?"

The demon continued to laugh for a few more moments before Dean stabbed him with the demon knife.

"We need to get back to Cas."

Sam nodded and the two rushed to their car.

Castiel sat in his room watching some television while quietly eating some popcorn. He kept looking at the clock every few minutes, wondering where the Winchester brothers had gone. A slam of the front door signified that they had just gotten home.  
"Cas, are you home?" he heard Dean shout.

"I'm in my room." He answered.

Sam grabbed Dean's arm. "We shouldn't tell him."  
"Why not? He's gonna wonder why his brothers and sisters want to fight him eventually."  
"Yeah I know but; what if he freaks out? He's already stressed out as it is."

Dean sighed. "Fine; but can I at least talk to him privately?"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Uh, sure."

He watched his brother walk to the angel's open bedroom door. "Hey Cas, can we talk outside?"

Sam retreated to his room and closed the door.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah." Dean nodded. "I just think, with the whole uh, baby thing, we could talk and maybe clear the air a little."

"Okay." Castiel nodded. He put the nearly empty bowl down and followed Dean up the stairs.

Dean tapped his hands nervously on the wheel of the Impala. Why was he so nervous? They were just going to talk. Maybe it was because it had been a few months since they had really spoken to each other. But he knew if they didn't start now, the situation will be even tenser.

"So um, how is everything?"

Castiel looked at Dean with a questionable face. "Um, I'm doing fine I guess."

Dean sighed. "Look; it's been a few months since this whole thing started and I wanted to try to clear things up."

"Okay."

"What happened that night; I do remember it."

Castiel was in disbelief. "And you're now telling me?"

"I didn't remember at first but then things started coming back. I just want to say, I had no control over what was going on but I'm very sorry that this happened."

"Well, none of us really expected this to happen."

Dean chuckled lightly. "Yeah; I guess we didn't realize the consequences of unprotected sex."

Castiel laughed.

"So you're sure that you're feeling alright? I want you to tell me everything because I'm here for you. Sam is here for you too. You don't need to be alone in this."

Castiel couldn't believe it. Dean was supportive. Why did he ever doubt the hunter? Just earlier he was planning on doing this whole thing solo; but his emotions made him forget one thing. The Winchester brothers would never abandon him.

"Actually; I'm kind of craving a cheeseburger right now."

"I can get you that." Dean started the car and the two headed off to the nearest fast food place.


	7. Family Reunion

Castiel sat up quickly in his bed at the sound of Sam's obnoxiously loud blender. With a groan, he slowly got out of bed and crept into the bathroom. He found himself more tired these past few weeks; sometimes he didn't even get out bed which worried the Winchesters; especially Dean. Castiel found it so funny how quickly they were able to rekindle their friendship and go back to normal. Well, almost normal. He looked down at his abdomen; the reason why he was so tired. He furrowed his brows as he took another look at his stomach; it looked bloated. Facing the mirror and turning to the side, Castiel lifted his shirt to reveal that his stomach had grown; just enough to be noticeable. When he was about to feel the bump, Sam had barged in with his laptop.

"Hey Cas, I- Oh sorry. Is everything alright?"

Castiel sighed and pulled down his shirt. "I have begun to show."

"Wow; already? You're only about twelve weeks now, right?"

"I believe so." Castiel gestured the laptop. "Did you find anything?"

"I think I did; have you ever heard of an Incubus?"

"You think an Incubus may be involved?"  
"Yes, but I don't think it was the one planning this whole thing. I think someone was manipulating it to abuse its powers."

"How so?"

"Well an Incubus usually impregnates a woman. It wouldn't defy the laws of nature on purpose unless someone forced it to."

"It is true' Incubus only focus on women."  
"And get this; because they're a type of spirit, they have to possess a male host in order to impregnate the female."

"So we have the puppet."  
"But who's the puppeteer?"

"That's what I'm going to figure out next." Sam nodded.  
"Where is Dean?"

"He's outside fixing the car. Actually, would you okay being alone for a few minutes? I have to go make a phone call to have Patrice come and take a look at your progress."

"That's fine; I'll just be resting."

"Alright; I'll be in my room so shout if you need anything." Sam exited, leaving Castiel's door open.

The angel looked back in the mirror and laid a hand on his abdomen. It felt firm; strange. He didn't think he was going to get used to this; and it was only going to get worse.

Suddenly Castiel felt as if someone was watching him. He turned around, thinking it was Sam. But he was very wrong. Standing in front of him was an old face; someone who was supposed to be dead years ago.

"Uriel." Castiel swallowed.

"Hello Castiel, it's been a long time."

"You're dead; Anna had killed you."

"I know that."

"So how are you standing here then?"

Uriel sighed and walked to Castiel's door, closing and locking it before facing the angel again.

"We can discuss that later. We need to talk."

"About what?"

"The unborn child."

Castiel quickly took a few steps back. "How do you know about that?"

"Castiel; all of your brothers and sisters know about the news. They were shocked at first of course, but now they are overjoyed."

"Well that's good to hear."

"I have come here to invite you to join us so we can celebrate."

"I think I'll take my chances and stay here."

"With the Winchester brothers? You really think they'll be safe with you around? The demons will be coming after you, wanting to hunt you down and they won't stop at anyone who gets in the way. You'd be safer in Heaven; you'd be keeping Sam and Dean safe."

Castiel looked towards the door. The Winchester brothers said they would be there for him and help him through the whole thing. But what if Uriel was right? He knew he shouldn't trust the angel, but he also didn't want to risk getting Sam and Dean killed.

"If you decide to come, I will be waiting outside at midnight. You will have all day to make a decision."

Before Castiel could answer, Uriel had vanished.

 _What am I supposed to do?_

Castiel couldn't focus for the rest of the day. He had lost his appetite during lunch and sat in bed most of the time. For some reason he couldn't decide. He knew it had to be a bad idea to listen to his brother that had betrayed the angels in the past. But he couldn't help but feel a sense of worry when he thought about staying with the Winchester brothers. He knew he couldn't ask for an opinion from Sam and Dean; knowing they would tell him it was a bad idea. But what if they were in danger? What if there was a chance that they could get killed because of him? He would be safe in Heaven, away from the demons.

When dinner finally came, Castiel was leaning closer towards staying with the Winchester brothers. Uriel couldn't prove that he wasn't safe in the bunker. He still wondered how he got in himself however. Sam had made a delicious healthy meal for the angel while Dean had chowed down on some greasy pizza. This sometimes annoyed Castiel because he couldn't eat whatever he wanted while he was pregnant. He started to understand why women were so moody about food all the time now.

"Cas, is everything alright?" Sam noticed that the angel seemed distracted. "If Dean's food is bugging you I can make him leave.  
"Hey! I'm right here!" Dean mumbled mid chew on his third slice.

"No it's not the food. I guess I'm just having a lot of thoughts about the future."

"Oh, like what?"

"I guess just how we're gonna raise this child if it does survive and how the world will change."

"I can understand being worried Cas, but you can't really predict the future. You just gotta go with the flow." Dean made a wave with his arm.

Sam nodded in agreement.

"I suppose you're right."

*CRASH

"What the hell was that?" Dean stood up and pulled out his pistol.

"Stay here with Cas, I'll go check it out." Sam pulled out his own pistol and walked towards the noise.

"What do you think that was?"

"Maybe a demon? They aren't usually that desperate to get into the bunker."  
"Well now they have a reason."

"Oh yeah."

Without any warning, Dean was suddenly tackled to the ground by a demon.

"Run Cas!"

Castiel quickly rushed to his bedroom and slammed the door. But realized he made a mistake when he turned to another demon that was waiting on his bed.

It snarled and charged at the angel but it's life was quickly ended by Castiel's angel blade.

The angel dropped his blade and took a few quick breaths.

Uriel was right; he was actually right. There was no way that he could stay here. He had to leave quick; but not without leaving a note.

Dean pushed off the demon that he managed to kill just in time. With a groan; he stood up and looked around.

"Cas?"  
Sam entered instead. "He's not with you?"

"No I told him to run."  
The two exchanged worried looks before charging to his room.

The angel was gone. All that was left was a letter sitting on his bed.

"What does it say?" Dean asked as Sam picked it up.

"Dear Sam and Dean. Due to the nature of the situation, I feel you two will be in danger if I'm around. I have left to join my brothers and sisters as they will care for me. I will come back once everything comes far. I hope you understand. Cas."

"We should have told him. Now they're gonna kill him!" Dean slammed his hand against the door.

"Relax Dean; there may be time to get him back. I bet they want him to feel welcome first before attacking. If they immediately strike he'd get away. I'm gonna call Patrice and cancel that appointment. You start packing; we're going after him."

"Got it." Dean ran off to his room to start grabbing guns. Sam stared at the bed for a few more seconds.

 _What made him want to leave?_


End file.
